Quickie #1
%26gt;
%26gt; One day, Jay Dini came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in a
%26gt;very sexy nightie.
%26gt; "Tie me up," she purred, "and you can do anything you want."
%26gt; So he tied her up and went fishing.
%26gt;
%26gt;
%26gt; Quickie #2
%26gt;
%26gt;
%26gt; A woman came home, screeching! her car into the driveway, and ran
%26gt;into the house.
%26gt; She slammed the door and shouted at the top of her lungs, "Honey,
%26gt;pack your bags. I won the damn lottery!"
%26gt; The husband said, "Oh my God! What should I pack, beach stuff or
%26gt;mountain stuff?"
%26gt; "Doesn't matter," she said. "Just get the hell out."
%26gt;
%26gt;
%26gt; Quickie #3
%26gt;
%26gt; Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right, and
%26gt;the other is a husband.
%26gt;
%26gt;
%26gt; Quickie #4
%26gt;
%26gt; A Polish immigrant went to the DMV to apply for a driver's license.
%26gt; First, of course, he had to take an eye sight test.
%26gt; The optician showed him a card with the letters:
%26gt; 'C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.'
%26gt; "Can you read this?" the optician asked.
%26gt; "Read it?" the Polish guy replied, "I know the guy."
%26gt;
%26gt; Quickie #5
%26gt;
%26gt; Mother Superior called all the nuns together and said to them, "I
%26gt;must tell you all
%26gt; something. We have a case of gonorrhea in the convent."
%26gt; "Thank God," said an elderly nun at the back. "I'm so tired of
%26gt;chardonnay."
%26gt;
%26gt; Quickie #6
%26gt;
%26gt; A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.
%26gt;Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen.
%26gt; "Careful," he said, "CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD!
%26gt;You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We
%26gt;need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They're
%26gt;going to STICK!
%26gt; Careful...CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when
%26gt;you're cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST
%26gt;your mind?
%26gt; Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them.
%26gt;Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!!! THE SALT!!!"
%26gt; The wife stared at him. "What in the world is wrong with you? You
%26gt;think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"
%26gt; The husband calmly replied, "I wanted to show you what it feels like
%26gt;when I'm driving."
%26gt;
%26gt; Quickie #7
%26gt;
%26gt; Fifty-one years ago, Herman James, a North
%26gt; Carolina mountain man, was drafted by the Army.
%26gt; On his first day in basic training, the Army issued him a comb.
%26gt; That afternoon the Army barber sheared off all his hair.
%26gt; On his second day, the Army issued Herman a toothbrush.
%26gt; That afternoon the Army dentist yanked seven of his teeth.
%26gt; On the third day, the Army issued him a jock strap.
%26gt; The Army has been looking for Herman for 51 years
Quickies, Enjoy and hope you have a great Labor day!?
Those were hilarious thank you.
Quickies, Enjoy and hope you have a great Labor day!?
4 6 and 7 are my faves! i was laughing sooo hard on 6 and then i got to seven...lol
Quickies, Enjoy and hope you have a great Labor day!?
LOL -
Quickie #6 was the very best from the bunch
Quickies, Enjoy and hope you have a great Labor day!?
#4 is hilarious...I loved #6 as well.....all in all....great jokes...I hope to see more from you in the future.
Quickies, Enjoy and hope you have a great Labor day!?
Thanks I needed that!
Quickies, Enjoy and hope you have a great Labor day!?
All cute. I really liked #2.
Quickies, Enjoy and hope you have a great Labor day!?
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-HAHAHAHA
LMMFAO
AHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA...
DANG THEY'RE FUNNY
Quickies, Enjoy and hope you have a great Labor day!?
I lUV 2 6and 7 they were hilarious thanks for the laugh.
Quickies, Enjoy and hope you have a great Labor day!?
before I was only nice but these are the oldest jokes ever! sorry
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